Accepting Responsibility

Stop Blaming, Start Building: The Path to a Thriving Church
In a culture where finger-pointing has become second nature, where every failure needs a scapegoat and every shortcoming requires an excuse, there's a revolutionary concept that could transform not just our individual lives, but our entire faith communities: accepting responsibility.
The sobering reality is that approximately 20 churches close their doors every week in America. Since the pandemic, that number has only increased. Pastors are resigning, congregations are dissolving, and communities are losing their spiritual lighthouses. But here's the hope-filled truth: it doesn't have to be this way.
The Early Church's Blueprint for Problem-Solving
The Book of Acts gives us a masterclass in organizational health and conflict resolution. In Acts 6:1-7, we find a young church—just days old, really—facing its first internal crisis. With 4,000 members from diverse backgrounds, tensions arose when Greek-speaking widows were being overlooked in the daily food distribution while the local Hebrew widows were well cared for.
This was a legitimate grievance. The complaint was valid. The inequality was real.
But what happened next is instructive for every church, organization, and individual facing challenges today.
The apostles didn't dismiss the complaint. They didn't make excuses. They didn't blame the complainers for being divisive. Instead, they acknowledged the problem and immediately took action—but not in the way we might expect.
Rather than abandoning their primary calling to fix the problem themselves, they empowered the community to solve it. "Seek out from among you seven men of good reputation, full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business," they instructed.
The result? The right people were placed in the right positions. The apostles continued their work of prayer and teaching. The widows—all of them—were served. And the church grew exponentially.
The Blame Game: Four Excuses That Kill Churches
When organizations begin to decline, a predictable pattern emerges: the search for someone or something to blame. Churches are no exception.
1. "It's the Community's Fault"
How often do we look at our changing neighborhoods and shake our heads? "People just aren't interested in church anymore. Families don't prioritize faith like they used to. The culture has shifted."
Yes, culture has changed. But assigning blame to the community is simply an excuse for our own lack of engagement. Within three miles of most churches, thousands of people remain unchurched—not because they're unreachable, but because no one has truly tried to reach them.
The question isn't whether the neighborhood has changed. The question is: have we changed with it? Are we meeting people where they are, or are we waiting for them to come to where we've always been?
2. "It's the Other Church's Fault"
The mega-church across town with its lights, programs, and contemporary worship has stolen all our members. We can't compete.
This mindset reveals a fundamental misunderstanding of the mission. The church isn't competing for market share. We're not dividing a limited customer base. There are enough lost, hurting, searching people for every church to have a full house and a full mission field.
When we focus on what other churches are doing—or what they have that we don't—we take our eyes off the harvest field right in front of us.
3. "It's the Worship Style's Fault"
If only we were more contemporary. If only we were more traditional. If only we had better music, newer technology, hipper presentation.
Here's the reality: thriving churches exist across the entire spectrum of worship styles. Some are deeply traditional with hymns and organs. Others are cutting-edge contemporary with full bands and light shows. The common denominator isn't the style—it's the substance.
When we're truly united in Christ, focused on His glory rather than our preferences, we can celebrate diversity in expression. One person's favorite song might not resonate with another, but when both are offered to God with sincere hearts, both are beautiful.
Unity doesn't mean uniformity. It means keeping Christ as the common denominator.
4. "It's the Pastor's Fault"
When a church cycles through five pastors in fifteen years, each time convinced that the next one will finally "get it right," the problem isn't the pastors—it's the pattern.
Leadership matters, certainly. But a church that refuses to look inward, that continually seeks external solutions to internal problems, will never experience true revival.
From Infant to Mature: The Shift from "Me" to "We"
There's a telling characteristic of infants: everything revolves around them. When they cry, the world must stop. Their needs are the only needs that matter.
But maturity brings a beautiful transformation. We begin to realize the world doesn't revolve around us. We start asking different questions: "How can I help? Who needs what I have to offer? Where can I serve?"
This same maturity must characterize our churches. A congregation focused solely on meeting the needs of its members—"What programs do we have? What are my needs? How are we being served?"—is a church stuck in infancy.
But a church that looks outward, that asks "How can we serve our community? What needs exist that we can meet? How can we build bridges to those who don't yet know Christ?"—that's a church positioned for growth and impact.
Building Bridges Through Service
Sometimes we can't immediately share the Gospel with someone. They're not ready to hear it. The ground hasn't been prepared.
But we can always serve. We can always meet a need. We can always show up with compassion and consistency.
Service builds bridges that words alone cannot construct. When people see authentic care, when they experience genuine love in action, barriers fall. Hearts soften. And suddenly, they're willing to listen to the message behind the mission.
You can't force-feed someone the Gospel. But you can walk alongside them through life's challenges, demonstrating Christ's love through your actions, until they ask about the hope within you.
Light in the Darkness
Make no mistake: the world is growing darker. Our culture is moving further from God's light, and the trajectory shows no signs of reversing on its own.
But here's the beautiful truth about light and darkness: even one small candle in a pitch-black room cannot be hidden. It pushes back the darkness simply by existing.
As the world grows darker, the opportunity for light-bearers grows greater. Every believer, every church committed to shining Christ's light becomes more visible, more needed, more impactful.
The Call to Action
So where does this leave us? Whether you're part of a thriving congregation or a struggling one, whether your church is growing or declining, the call is the same: stop blaming and start building.
Stop blaming the community, the culture, other churches, leadership, or worship styles. Start accepting responsibility for the mission field right in front of you.
Look around your church not to point fingers, but to identify opportunities. Where could you serve better? What needs exist that you're uniquely positioned to meet? How can you love your community more effectively?
The diagnosis is clear: churches that serve their communities with an outward focus don't die. Churches that build genuine relationships, meet real needs, and consistently point people to Christ continue to thrive regardless of cultural shifts.
The prescription is equally clear: embrace responsibility, empower people for service, keep priorities straight, and focus outward.
The choice, as always, is ours.